In October, police in Liyang in eastern China arrested a man whom they accused of stealing women’s underwear prolifically. They said a device like a fishing rod enabled the man to reach into windows and extract garments. The suspect, 32, admitted to using the device for three years. In his van, police found 285 bras and 185 panties.
How Tons Translate To Stupid
A tractor-trailer driver with a 35-ton load of bottled water tried to make it over a historic bridge in Paoli, Ind. The driver told police she saw the “6 Ton Limit” sign, but didn’t know how tons “translated” to pounds. As could have been expected, the bridge collapsed as the truck crossed it.
‘Natural Animal Behavior’
In December, animal protection officers in Halland County, Sweden, confiscated two cats that the officers found being “mistreated” in a home — coddled (by two women) as babies in “pushchairs” and spoon-fed while strapped in high chairs. Both cats had been encouraged to suck on pacifiers. The public broadcaster SVT reported that the cats were removed from the home because they were not being allowed to develop “natural animal behavior.”
More Or Less Dead
Russia’s independent RT news site reported the most recent case of a man who’d been declared dead waking up in a morgue. After a harrowing few hours, the man returned to the site of the party where he’d “died.” He found his friends still drinking, but also commemorating him.
Hard Times For Science
Among the activists denouncing a proposed solar-panel farm at a Woodland, N.C., Town Council meeting were a husband and wife who were certain that vegetation near the panels would die because the panels would — as the husband said — “suck up all the energy from the sun.” His wife, who described herself as a “retired science teacher,” explained that the solar panels “prevent photosynthesis” — and cause cancer to boot. The couple must have been convincing, as the council voted a moratorium on the panels.
Never Give Up
Paul Stenstrom of Tarpon Springs, Fla., is among the most recent Americans to have discovered the brightest side of federal bankruptcy law, namely, that he lived in his mortgaged home free of charge from 2002 until 2013 by using the law to stave off foreclosure. Even though none of his 15 petitions was ever approved, he followed each petition with another petition immediately. It wasn’t until 2013 that one judge finally declared Stenstrom a “serially abusive filer” and barred further petitions for two years. At this point, his bank was able to conclude the foreclosure. On expiration of the two-year period in September, 2015, Stenstrom quickly filed another bankruptcy petition — to keep from being evicted from the townhouse for which he owes four months’ rent.
Bright Ideas
— Carlos Aguilera, 27, became the most recent brain-surgery patient to help doctors by remaining conscious during the operation. He also played his saxophone to assure surgeons that their removal of a tumor was not affecting his speech, hearing or movement. News of the Weird has reported on two such operations in the United States, including one on a guitar-strumming man in 2013 at the UCLA Medical Center.
Least Competent Criminals
— Nurse’s aide Candace McCray, 36 (above), wore some of the jewelry she had stolen when she met with police detectives investigating the theft. An assisted-living resident in Palm Beach Gardens, Fla., had described her missing gems. Police knew McCray had access to the woman’s room.
— Joshua Jording, 26, of Latrobe, Penn., became the most recent burglary suspect caught on surveillance video while wearing a shirt with his name on it. The shirt was later found in Jording’s home, along with a stash from the burglary.
Carjacking Fails
— Albert Luna, 19, was arrested in Coachella, Calif., and charged with swiping the keys of a Federal Express driver who was unloading a package. The driver reported that Luna walked away when he couldn’t figure out how to drive the truck. The arrest report noted that during the entire episode, Luna was naked.
— Kyle Blair, 25, was arrested in Surrey, B.C., when he approached a car at an intersection and attempted to pull the driver out. The two men in the car were later described as “big, burly” guys. More important, they were plainclothes police officers on a stakeout.
Unclear On The Concept
— Jamie, 29, and Abbie Hort, 21, an unemployed couple drawing housing and other government benefits, won a United Kingdom lottery prize worth $72,000. They promptly spent it all (including “some” on “silly” stuff, Abbie admitted). According to a January press report, the couple is angry that the government will not immediately re-institute their benefits. Abbie said that as lottery winners, she and Jamie “deserved to buy some nice stuff” and go on holiday, but that now, except for the large-screen TV and Jamie’s Ralph Lauren clothes, the winnings are gone. Said Jamie, last Christmas was just “the worst ever.”
— Public relations spokesman Phil Frame, 61, was arrested in Shelby Township, Mich., after a Jan. 1 sheriff’s office search of his computer and paper files turned up child pornography. The Detroit News reported that Frame had already been questioned about child pornography by the U.S. Dept. of Homeland Security. But he was apparently too lazy to clear out his files.
Another Way To Tell You’re Really Drunk
Elena Bartman-Wallman, 23, was behind the wheel on a December afternoon in Aleknagik, Alaska. Her passengers had long since run away. Her car’s tires had started to smoke. She had lodged her foot against the accelerator; and was facing the wrong way on the road, with her wheels spinning continuously. By the time police arrived, Bartman-Wallman had passed out and the front tires had melted down to the rims.
A Hand Up
Though New York City’s waiting list for subsidized housing stands at over 300,000, the housing agency has only nominal ability to evict a tenant who once qualified but has subsequently become affluent. According to a November WPIX-TV report, one household that earned $497,911 in a recent year remains in NYC subsidized housing. At first, one housing authority official declared it beneficial that such a mixture of income levels occupy subsidized housing so that struggling families don’t just have only other struggling families for neighbors. Public pressure made the authority reconsider.
Too Tough
Mendel Epstein of Lakewood, N.J., isn’t the only rabbi suspected of being overaggressive when he helps desperate wives obtain divorces that will meet the requirements of their religion. But he will be headed to prison for 10 years after a federal court found that he used beatings, stun guns and even a cattle prod to convince reluctant husbands they should sign the papers. Orthodox Jewish wives can’t remarry properly without obtaining a “get,” and Rabbi Epstein was apparently very “convincing.” According to trial evidence, he used the services of four thugs. “Over the years,” Epstein confessed in court, “I guess I got caught up in my tough-guy image.”
Binge Voyeurism
London’s Metropolitan Police called it the biggest case of voyeurism they’d ever seen. A judge sent George Thomas, 38, to prison for four years for his six-year spree of furtively photographing women. Thomas, a former manager for the Ernst and Young accounting firm, filmed more than 3,500 people, including children, and even babies, with cameras in his and others’ homes and in the restrooms of coffee shops and workplaces. Among the stash of photos, police found a shot of Thomas’ face, which he inadvertently photographed as he was setting up one of the cameras.
Streaming News
A recent anonymous book by a National Football League player reported that “linemen” have taken to relieving themselves inside their uniforms during games. The practice, said the author, is “a sign that you’re so into the game” that you “won’t pause even to use the toilet.”
Running Water Is Overrated
Nell’s Country Kitchen in Winter Haven, Fla., was shut down again — for “remodeling,” the owner said — after a health inspector found that it had been operating for two weeks without running water. Its water was coming from a garden hose connection that ran across its parking lot and was attached to a neighbor’s spigot. It had been closed earlier because of mold, roach activity and rodent droppings. Management insisted that business immediately picked up the day the restaurant reopened.
Weird News You Can Use
In November, 2015, the Centers for Disease Control attempted once again to tout an effective anti-HIV drug — after a recent survey revealed that a third of primary-care doctors said they had never heard of it. Truvada, taken once a day, said the CDC, provides “better than 90 percent” protection from risky gay sex and better than 70 percent protection from HIV acquired from the sharing of needles. Truvada is the only FDA-approved retroviral drug for retarding HIV. (Its maker, Gilead Sciences, has declined to advertise it for that purpose.)
Oklahoma Justice
In 2004, abusive boyfriend Robert Braxton, Jr., was charged with administering a severe beating to the three children of girlfriend Tondalo Hall, 20. The children’s injuries ranged from bruises to fractured legs and ribs. Braxton got a deal from Oklahoma City prosecutors; pleaded guilty; served two years in prison; and was released in 2006. On the other hand, Hall’s plea bargain resulted in a 30-year sentence for having failed to protect her kids from Braxton. She’s still in prison. In September, 2015, following a rejected appeal, the Pardon and Parole Board refused, 5-0, to commute her sentence to 10 years of time served.
Wrong Place, Wrong Time
— Neighbors in Inola, Okla., complained for two months about a Union Pacific train that had been parked “for weeks” while tracks ahead of it were under repair. Not only did the train block a traffic intersection, it triggered the ringing of the crossing signal. “It’s annoying, yeah,” said one resident.
— At a ski resort in western Vorarlberg, Austria, the ski lift was temporarily stopped to address a problem on the lift. One occupied lift basket came to rest in front of the industrial-strength artificial snow-making machine, drenching the two passengers in a several-minutes-long blizzard. (Yes, there’s an internet video of the incident.)
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