By Diana Vallette
A few weeks ago, I arrived home from work and found the door under my garage unlocked and open. I’m usually very good about locking my door, and immediately a chill ran up my spine. Since I’m a single gal who lives alone with five young children, I had no choice but to be the person walking through the home checking for bad guys.
My heart was pounding and my palms were sweaty. I had 911 typed out on my cellphone just in case I needed it. One button and hopefully the police would be on their way to rescue me. Was that the best plan? Probably not.
Luckily, everything was okay, and it was likely a result of my being too busy or too distracted, but those situations are the exact situations Amber Landry was made for.
In 2020, in the heart of COVID, Landry saw panic spread across our community, and she made it her business to calm and empower the population — especially the female population.
“First responders’ response times were delayed, and I could sense that people were uneasy. So, I started making social media content teaching women how they could order a tourniquet in the event they were to need one or how they should start incorporating vitamin C into their diets to keep sickness at bay. I wanted people to begin to take ownership of their own lives,” she says. “Evil is rampant, but if we try to spot danger before it spots us we can be a source of strength.”
Landry, who was born and raised in Jeff Davis Parish, recently invited me to sit down and chat with her about self-defense and situational awareness. It’s coursework she’s offered all around the country — and on the internet — since 2020, and she’s now bringing it home to Southwest Louisiana.
“It’s not the self-defense most people think about,” Landry says. “Though, there’s a place for that, too. Self-defense is not something we hold in our hands. It sits between our ears.” Landry’s flavor of self-defense doesn’t start with how to break your opponent’s nose or how to shoot a gun; it starts with something much simpler and much more doable.
Before we sit down for class, Landry sends an email meant to encourage me and calm any anxieties I might have. “We will review practical scenarios through role playing,” the email reads. “So, come prepared with a few examples of situations and places where you have felt any level of fear or hesitation lately.”
The Class
First, Landry speaks about the gift of being a woman. “Women are naturally more likely, because of the continuity between our left and right brain, to tap into emotion easier than men can, generally speaking. Women have gut instincts and are able to discern energies that it seems men are usually blind to.”
I relate to this. I’ve always said men are aware of what’s happening and what’s been said on the surface while women are keenly aware of both what’s happening on the surface and what’s happening just below the surface. It’s why we hear men say we’re “reading too much into” something. The truth is they’re not reading into it enough — or at all.
“Self-defense begins in the mind,” Landry says. “It’s a mindset. How can we physiologically use being a woman to our advantage? Criminals are always looking for someone who is an easy target. They’re lazy. We must move through the world aware and posturing our bodies in a way that indicates we won’t be an easy target. Eyes up, buttercup.”
Landry, who is a trained nurse, was raised in a self-reliant family and, as a result, has become the ‘designated defender’ among her girlfriends when they hit the town for girls’ night.
“Here in the south, women worry about being rude or unkind. It’s important to remember that your assertiveness will not make a good man violent, but if you’re someone who struggles to be assertive, you can always utilize code words.”
It’s a trick she uses with friends and even with her children. “If we’re at the park and there’s something or someone making one of my children uncomfortable, they’ll use the code word.”
The code word keeps the child from feeling like they’re tattling. “You could say something like ‘We need to go feed the dog’ if you don’t have a dog. Or, if you have younger children, it could be something as simple as ‘flamingo.’”
Landry reminds me that during anxious situations, most of us have either a freeze, flight or flee response. We know, thanks to the example of those in the military and law enforcement, that we can adjust our natural anxious response. How?
“First, you have to keep in mind that you can’t take your body to a place your mind hasn’t been. It’s important to mentally train otherwise you’re likely to panic and freeze.”
A Few of Landry’s Tips
— Carry a flashlight in your purse in the event you find yourself in a dark parking lot
— If you feel uncomfortable with someone, use both your voice and posture to create distance. Raise your arm and say “Stop” or “No” forcefully.
— Take 15 seconds to scan the parking lot before exiting your car
— Find your keys in your purse before exiting a store
— If you feel uncomfortable with someone, maintain eye contact. “No one wants to walk up to a woman who’s looking them dead in the eye,” Landry says.
— Teach your children to look for taillights in parking lots.
— When ride sharing, check the license plate to make sure it matches that of your driver. And sit behind the driver once you enter.
Landry offers both corporate and personal training. For more information, digital resources, online courses or free guides, visit amber-elle.com.
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