Da Good, Da Bad An Da Ugly

Pierre Sez Thursday, January 19, 2017 Comments Off on Da Good, Da Bad An Da Ugly
Da Good, Da Bad An Da Ugly

Mo an mo folks are movin into dis area every day. Work iz good; an de outrageous amount bein charged for rent is bad; and de ugly is de fact dat nuttin haz been done wit de Harrah’s property or dat crumblin garage next to it.

Hopefully de next mayor will get sometin movin on a new I-10 bridge az well az de garage an Harrah’s.

Da real estate situation at present iz horrible. Realtors are rentin mobile homes for $1,500 wit a $1,500 deposit. An homes dat were listed at $125,000 were pulled off de market an are now listed at $175,000. Apartment rent haz just skyrocketed.

But dat boom uf LNG plants won’t last forever. An dem workers will haul butt to another town. Realtors here will be boorayin dat de market iz down. Well, if day hadn’t been so greedy an had made housin available to folks, day wouldn’t have dis problem.

Landry Stalls Again

Dana Landry, who haz de old Sears buildin property, tole de media last year dat he would be up an runnin wid de project dat included housin and shoppin. Now he is announcin yet anudder delay an “expects” to start in April. Want to bet he doesn’t?

In de meantime, de city an parish continue to lose taxes dat day would collect if de project were completed. We’re talkin about sales tax generated by shops in de complex an higher property tax generated by de apartments. We hope we have a start date when April rolls around instead uf anudder excuse an delay.


Da Trump administration announced day will spend billions to improve infrastructure in dis country. It would be a boost to de area if de I-10 bridge would be included in de list.

Now, it’s up to our congressmen an senators to speak for Southwest Louisiana regardin dis matter. Folks, we can tell you dis project can’t be funded by de parish. An de state is broke. So de only chance is threw federal funds. Our congressman an senator should pitch it az a hurricane evacuation route. An it would be, if folks hit de Galveston-Houston area. I can assure you a million folks would head east.

Now, before Hurricane Sandy, congressmen an senators weren’t too cool on givin money for hurricane protection. But now de legislative bodies in New York an New Jersey understands what it means to have a huge surge comin and not bein able to get out because uf a bridge. So maybe we can get on dat infrastructure list.

Mayor’s Race Gets Interestin

Will de eight announced candidates make it to de startin gate an qualify for de race? We hear uf at least two who plan to pull out. Money iz usually de reason for dat. But udders pull out because uf lack uf support or somebody haz pulled some dirt on dem. I’m not sayin dat’s de case wit dese folks. I’m just comin up wit reasons why people pull out.

On de udder hand, we have one candidate who had a $1,000-per-ticket fundraiser. Dat’s huge even in big cities. Meantime, we’ll watch de race real carefully.

Long Shot Iz A Good Read

I got my hands on a book written by Lagniappe contributor Jeremy Alford an Tyler Bridges, a political writer from New Awlins. De book gives a play by play account uf de last governor’s race. Any time you have a book wit a foreword by James Carville an his wife Mary Matlin, you know you will be readin a good book. Long Shot falls in dat category.

My favorite quote is from Rolfe McCollister of Louisiana Business: “Vitter may be forgiven for his past sins. But he’s still vindictive and threatening. I saw that side of him first-hand at Books-A-Million, where he was scheduled to meet with a group of McNeese young Republicans. He walked in and began cursing the group and accusing them of being late. One girl, who had held back tears, produced a memo that included the time signed by him. They were on time and he was half an hour late. I scratched him off my list after that.”

It’s A Louisiana Sales Tax

National an local media keep callin de tax Amazon will charge Louisiana customers a Amazon tax. Dis iz a sales tax on stuff bought on Amazon an sent to state an local gubments. State an local folks are startin to realize dat de big boxes like Sears, Home Depot, Lowes an udders are sellin mo online an dar customers are not payin sales tax. Pretty soon, all 50 states will be gettin internet tax. Jus remember, Amazon ain’t payin dis tax. You an me iz when we buy sometin from dem.

Enough Already 

Everywhere you drive in Lake Charles, you have new Texas Turnarounds. Yet promises about improved infrastructure have been jus dat … promises. Some uf our police jurors need to have a come to Jesus meetin’ wit dat Go Zone bunch an remind dem dat priority No. 1 is infrastructure an not turnarounds.

Watch Your Wallet

Da Louisiana Legislature will be in session pretty soon an beggin for mo money. You have a shortage of $330 million from last year’s budget. Meanwhile, Gov. John John has blamed legislators who served in de las session for not comin up wit de money.

A popular tax among states iz de gasoline tax. We have seen dem try to raise it in Louisiana in recent years, but day got turned down.

Folks, remember how de TIME money wuz spent on projects udder dan de ones it was voted for?

Deep Taughts While Fishin For Specs At Big Lake

10. Who will make de run-off in de Lake Charles mayor’s race?

9. Can de LSU an McNeese men’s basketball teams get it goin for de second half uf de season?

8. Where’s dem quail T-Claude promised me from his hunt in Morrow?

7. Will de Cameron Fur Festival be great again dis year?

6. Iz de Astros’ front office gettin a few mo good players to get in de World Series?

5. What can I do to keep squirrels out of my bird feeder?

4. Iz my buddy Tommy gonna take me to a New Awlins Pelicans game?

3. Will Dallas make it to de Super Bowl?

2. When will de crawfish be big enough to eat?

1. Will my brother behave like a cooyon at de Mardi Gras ball again dis year?

Troopers Have Cameras

De Louisiana State Police are now wearin body cameras. So, befo you lie to de judge about how your civil rights were violated, just remember, “Smile, because you’re on Candid Camera.” Now some local officers have cameras. Guess it’s just a matter uf time befo everybody wit a badge will have a camera.

Final Shot

My fran Lefty inherited a little money from his uncle. Don’t you know a few days later, he shows up at my house wit a lawn mower dat has a 65-inch cut, two whistles, a horn an a side seat. I reminded him dat he only had half an acre to cut. In his usual fashion, Lefty replied, “When money ain’t an issue, dar ain’t no such ting az too much mower.”

‘Til next time, lache pas la patate.

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