Handshakes and hugs should be like smiles and chuckles; anything longer turns a nice thing wronger.
Long explanations tend to be short on truth. Same goes for apologies: after a few sentences apologies have a bad habit of turning into rationalizations.
Long lives doesn’t mean well lived. Hitting triple digits doesn’t count for squat at the Pearly Gates.
The longer the name the shorter the nickname.
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Practical Matters
A long and winding road is less about A to B, and more about the sermons in curves, and the choir of scenery.
Long hauls are easier when you’re pulling a balanced load. Same goes for toting around a mind and a conscience for a lifetime.
Long fishing poles don’t guarantee big fish. A carpenter with a 30’ tape can still cut a board 3/16 too short. Too long in college might mean that a smart enough person wasn’t brave enough for life after school.
A longing heart is not always a wise heart.
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Long ‘n Longer
Long answers make us wish we hadn’t asked the question.
Longer cars make for farther parking.
Long words get in the way of getting something said, and understood.
Nobody complains of a long walk after they’ve considered making it a long crawl.
Long waits make for character development or character revelation.
Long receipts make for smaller bank accounts.
Long ago is all a matter of perspective. For some, it’s 12/7 of 1941, for others it’s 11/22 of 1963, and for others it’s 9/11 of 2001.
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Short Thinking on a Long Subject
A long snake is only guilty of being longer.
The longest hour is the one with the longest five minutes. In America we call that quitting time.
The more we long for Next the less we know about Now.
In old age we get what we longed for in our youth, a faster calendar.
The longer I keep telling the same story the better the story gets.
A long to-do list can be a paralyzing thing.
Long journeys only get you somewhere if that’s where you intended to go.
We all hate small talk until we hit a long span of silence.
A long porch sounds more homey than a long house.
Long lawsuits are more fun for the lawyer than for the client.
All long addictions began with trying it for the first time.
A long marriage deserves respect for the lasting.
A long, wonderful movie cannot compete with a long, wonderful novel.
Long lost sometimes is better not found.
Good writers use long sentences. Great writers don’t need to.
No matter how long the meal, there’s only so much appetite.
The longer you watch the clock, the less you’re doing with your time.
You’ll never see “long” in an advertisement for diets or exercise.
Long shadows are only cast at sundown. As it goes for trees, so it goes for human lives, so grow tall during your daylight decades.
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This edition of Uncle P’s Bedtime Stories is brought to you by Eighty-one, which hopes you long to come visit your favorite little store. Uncle P can be reached at 81creativity@gmail.com. Other Bedtime Stories can be found on the Eighty-one Facebook page.
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